IMHO: Bedtimes

Moms, have you ever been talking to another mom and thought to yourself “Why on earth would she do that? That’s not how I’m parenting MY kids”?

Well, if you answered “No”…well, then you’re lying. If you answered yes, kudos for your honesty. Regardless of your answer I want to touch on the topic. I want to call these posts IMHO which for the blogging newbies means “In My Honest Opinion” and the topic I am deciding to broach is bedtimes.

From the birth of my oldest daughter, Charlotte, I have been a firm believer in the bedtime routine. It has evolved the older she’s gotten but one thing remains the same; a firm bedtime. Now, I have been told by some moms that perhaps I am a bit rigid in my routine and that 8pm is a very early bedtime (though, I strongly disagree with that statement as I personally believe 8pm is a completely acceptable bedtime for a 3 and a 1 year old…just saying). Anyway, I want to offer my opinion and shed some light so the next time you ask the “why does she do it that way” question you may have an answer.

It’s true, as newborns our babies lives are pretty sweet. Eat, sleep, poop, repeat. Zero commitments, zero responsibilities. How awesome is that? However, you and I both know that this existence cannot last and that those commitments and responsibilities have a way of creeping up on us. Sure, your baby is fast asleep in her crib now but before you know it she’ll be starting school and that bedtime routine may be hard to come by.
I’m not here to tell you my way is the right way. It’s what works for me and my family. I am here to tell you WHY it works for us and how it could possibly work for you too.

A typical night in our house is as follows:
1)Pick up the toy room
2)Go upstairs and put on PJs
-Every other night is bath night
3)Pick out and read a story together
-Charlotte and I sometimes play a game of Candy Land
4)Hugs and Kisses and Prayers
5)Lights out by 8pm

Now, my children are not the Von Trapps. They do not respond to specialized whistles (though that is an idea…hahaha) and they most certainly respond with a fair amount of whining but they, for the most part, know what is expected of them (Charlotte more than Carrigan obviously). And despite being in a rigid routine 90% of the time, I have tried to let Charlotte stay up later for special movie nights and by 8:30pm she is saying “Mommy, I tired” or she just falls asleep. While it kind of bums me out when our special plan falls victim to our routine I also feel blessed that my daughter will have one less thing to adjust to when she goes to preschool next fall.That is the point of view I want other moms to see. That I’m not sticking my kids with this routine because I don’t want to spend time with them or I am being mean but because I want them to be disciplined. Discipline is healthy for kids and children who have a structured routine tend to be more confident and have less anxiety because they know what’s next. And I think we can all agree motherhood can be VERY chaotic…why not try to control the chaos a little?

I’ll be the first to admit that I like having control. I work through it the best I can and let go where I feel I can (Have you seen my house lately?!) but I really feel that a rigid routine is good for my whole family. We still have fun and there have been times when the routine has been altered but all in all, I am doing what’s best for MY family. Again, this is just my honest opinion but I feel bedtime routines make happy kids and happy mommies. If you’re already doing this, great! If you’re not, give it a try and let me know how it works for you.
I look forward to hearing from you all! Blessings!